About as real as I can get

Happy New Year! 2020. A year of "vision." Get it? 20-20 vision. Cheesy, I know, but true.

New year resolutions have always been a bit of a joke for me. Yeah, my intentions are good, but I always seem to fall of the good intention wagon.

This year may be the toughest resolution I've ever made. But it's necessary.







What does that mean? To me, it means giving into my own shortcomings and insecurities and accepting that that is who I am. It means being gentle with myself when things don't go exactly as planned. It's knowing that I am genuinely a good person with good intentions, but I am far from perfect.

It's knowing that I am not in control.

It's leaving the drama behind and recognizing that drama comes from others. It's not internalizing others' words or actions or facial expressions and letting it effect me. I have the final say on how I feel.

It's not about self-improvement. Sure, I'd love to be more charitable and thinner and have less aches and pains and travel more and live everyday like it's my last. It's about being my ideal self, and my ideal self is just being... me.

I say it often. I am me, take me or leave me.

It's about making good memories with the people I care about. It's about doing and saying things that create those great memories.

I had a teacher in high school who asked the class, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" When it was my turn to answer, I said "I want to be happy." She said, "What?!? You don't understand the question!" I said, "You don't understand life."

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