Photo: Getty Images
Lauren Alaina marked one year without her father in an emotional post on Wednesday evening (July 23).
Alaina, 30, shared last year that her father, J.J. Suddeth, had died, āand I really donāt have words yet.ā She dropped out of a few of her scheduled performances to be with her family. She thanked friends and family who āchecked up on me and continued to show up for me,ā when she spoke for the first time in the weeks after Suddethās passing.
āIāve spent the last 365 days learning how to live in a world that doesn't have my daddy in it. Some days I still forget and reach for the phone to tell him something. Other days, I sit in the silence and let the grief come in,ā Alaina wrote in a statement one year after the loss. āIāve learned that grief isnāt loud. Itās not always in the big moments. Itās in the little things⦠the empty chair during a game, the first Alabama kickoff that I didnāt get a āROLL TIDEā text and not having someone to tell when I heard a new joke. Itās the call I didn't get to make when I found out I was pregnant. Itās the absence in the hospital when the grandparents came to meet my little girl. Itās not saying Happy birthday, happy Fatherās Day, Merry Christmas.
āItās dreaming youāre here and waking up and remembering. Itās life moving forward but your heart feeling stuck in what was. Itās in the way I go about my days now. Slower. Softer. More aware of what truly matters and what doesnāt,ā she continued. āThereās a version of me that existed before July 23, 2024. And then thereās me now. This version of me handles things differently. I try to let go quicker. I laugh harder. I love more intentionally. I donāt flinch at the ālittle thingsā anymore. A car cuts me off, and I just let it go. Because I know that time is not promised, and life is too short to waste on anything that doesnāt really matter.
āI canāt call my dad anymore,ā Alaina wrote. āI canāt tell him about the things happening in my world right now, so I wrote him a song. Itās called āLittle Things.ā Itās not just a song, itās an open letter to him. A way of telling him how my heart and perspective have changed since he left us. I want him to know that his passing opened my eyes to so much. To prioritize my mental health. To call people back when I say Iām going to. To share if Iām struggling. To let go of things that donāt matter and focus on what does. To be quick to forgive. To be kinder. To be slow to anger. To love harder and deeper. I hope he would be proud.
āI hope heās up on a cloud listening to it right now and learning to play it on guitar,ā she concluded. āLove you, Daddy. Pinky.ā
Alaina and her husband, Cam Arnold, welcomed Baby No. 1 last month. The first-time parents named daughter Beni Doll Arnold after family members. Alaina, now grieving another ātremendous lossā in her family, previously shared that āit has been such a hard year losing my dad in July. And we werenāt even trying to get pregnant. I truly believe my dad got up there to heaven and said āwe gotta somehow get a baby involved.āā Beni Doll was born shortly before Fatherās Day, and the āHeaven Sentā artist shared at that time that if she ācould call you up there in Heaven, I would say thank you for sending me my little girl.ā
Alaina shared a sneak peek of an unreleased ballad called āLittle Thingsā as she shared a post in honor of her father. Listen to it on the final slide of her Instagram post here: